All posts by rosemaryheddens

Why the holy water doesn’t land on me.

Chillan, Chile. May 1, 2017. The bishop blesses the Catholics attending the Blessed Sacrament with holy water….

Every year at Easter, we Catholics renew our baptismal vows. Then for the next five weeks, our ministers pass among the congregation, sprinkling us with holy water as a further reminder of our vows.

Most often, the holy water misses me and I’ve often wondered why. I can think of some spiritual possibilities, but I think the answer is a more practical one. I am a middle-of-the-pew Christian. It’s not that the seats on the aisle are all taken. I arrive early to mass and usually have my choice of seats. I choose to sit in the middle.

As I look out at the congregation, it appears as though someone has taken a huge magnet and passed it over the middle of the rows of pews, pushing everyone to the sides like iron filings. The people on the aisles are often  firmly entrenched, and others are forced to wiggle their way around them. There are those who need to get up during the service, commentators, readers, ushers, etc.  Sitting on the aisle is a requirement for them so they don’t have to disturb anyone. For the rest of us, we have a choice.

In my hope to convert others to the joy of sitting in the middle, I would like to offer these advantages:

  •  There is a lot more room in the middle. With everyone crowded along the edges, those of us in the middle can spread out.
  •  There are really nice people in the middle. I’m not saying those on the aisles are not nice, but I feel a kind of kinship with those in the middle.
  •  You don’t have to worry about people climbing over and around you.
  • You get to stay to the very end of the service. There’s no reason to hurry out the door. Life is crazy out there. Why not linger a little longer were there is peace and joy.
  •  You will leave room for those who need to sit on the aisle–those who arrive late, parents with small children, people who have physical limitations.

Those of you who move into the middle can probably think of other advantages. It is my hope that by pointing this out, others may choose to join us. See you in church!

If you have questions or comments, you can email me at contactme@handyhelpersbooks.com

 

Be the first to write a review!

Now that Book Five is available to my readers, I am hard at work on Book Six. For me, writing is the fun part, but getting my books into the hands of readers is a different story. (Pardon the pun.) That’s where I struggle.

Although I am running advertising campaigns on Amazon, I don’t always get the results I hope for. I have come to realize that having lots of reviews is an important component of sales promotion.

That is why I am inviting the followers of this blog and anyone who stumbles upon it to read my book for free. I am willing to send a free copy of Book Five to the first twenty readers who are willing to write a review and post it on Amazon. I am looking for honest reviews from people who have read the book.

If you would be willing to help me out, send  an email to contactme@handyhelpersbooks.com. I will need your address so I can send you a book. Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Rosemary Heddens

P.S.

If you are wondering what this book is about, here’s a clue.

In this book, Laura is presented with an opportunity to do something that will make a difference. Challenged by her teacher to “be the change you wish to see in the world,” she reaches out to a lonely woman who works in the cafeteria. The effects of this act go far beyond what she would ever have anticipated.

 

Springtime is hikin’ time in Prescott, AZ.

The weather is finally warming up and I’m seeing more people on the trails. Recently, I headed to Thumb Butte to hike a new trail. You are probably aware of the loop trail that goes to the top of Thumb Butte, but did you know there are lots of trails on the north side of the road? Even if you’ve hiked some of these trails before, you might want to check them out again. The Greater Prescott Trail Planning group has added some new trails in that area. With help from the “Over the Hill Gang,” Prescott National Forest improved some of the social trails, making them full-fledged hiking and biking trails. One of those is the Piglet (trail 328). That was the trail I was heading for that day.

I wasn’t sure how the trail got its name until a family of javalina ran across the road in front of my car. I decided the trail was named for those pig-like animals that inhabit the area.

Once you reach the Thumb Butte picnic area and pay the $5 fee (It’s free on Wednesday), park near the host campsite. To reach trail 328, you will need to begin on 315. The trailhead is just to the left of the host. From 315, you will go on trail 317 for a short distance before reaching a gate that goes to some houses. Turn left at the gate, and you will be on trail 328. You will be treated to amazing views of the San Francisco Peaks, and Granite Mountain, as well as Little Granite Mountain.

Trail 328 ends at the 316. Go left onto 316 and it will return you to the parking lot. If you would like a longer hike, turn right on 316. There are plenty of pines and a little creek to cross. When you reach the 317, turn left to go back to the parking lot. Enjoy the views of Thumb Butte along the way.

 

Do you want to be right OR do you want to be happy?

Last week, I was sure that my daughter, Kirstin, told me a lie.  What she told me seemed very unlikely and I chewed her out for telling me a story. It wasn’t until several days later that I found out what she told me was not a lie at all.

Having to apologize is a very humbling experience. But Kirstin’s attitude through the whole thing made it even more humbling. When I called her a liar, she didn’t argue with me. She didn’t defend what she did or make excuses. In fact, she apologized. When it was my turn to say I was sorry, she was gracious and immediately forgiving. I spent some time thinking about this and it occurred to me that Kirstin was more concerned about my feelings than she was about being right.

I have often heard Dr. Phil ask a guest, “Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?” Of course, everyone says they want to be happy, but they continue defending what they have been doing. “How is that working for you?” is the next question Dr. Phil asks. And of course they admit that it isn’t working.

This makes me wonder why most of us seem to keep doing what we have always done and getting the results we always get, even when it isn’t working. I think I’m going to take a lesson from Kirstin and not worry so much about being right. Instead, I choose to be happy.

I’m hooked on the television series The Good Doctor. Dr. Shaun Murphy is a surgeon who has autism. In nearly every episode his “out of the box” thinking solves a problem that no one else can. Now there is a new chief surgeon who sees Dr. Murphy’s weaknesses more than his strengths and moved him from surgery to work in pathology. He is an excellent pathologist, but he wants to be a surgeon. Reluctantly, he goes to his new position and tries to make the best of it, but he can’t let go of the need to be a surgeon.

The previews for this week’s episode show the surgeons calling for Dr. Murphy to help with a problem in the operating room. I’m excited to see if the chief surgeon will re-evaluate his position and recognize Dr. Murphy’s special gifts.  Will he admit that he was wrong?

We hear a lot of talk about diversity, tolerance and acceptance, but often we fall short when it comes to putting those beliefs into action. We have a lot to learn from those among us who see the world just a little differently.

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night

Apparently, the mail carrier’s creed does not apply if you live on a snow-packed dirt road. After receiving more that two feet of snow in a day and a half, our mail delivery was suspended for a few days. Since I didn’t drive on that road myself, I totally understand.

I am on a contract route which means my carrier does not officially work for the post office. She does a fantastic job and often goes out of her way delivering packages that are too big for the mailbox. I have total admiration for her because I am well aware of the crummy roads she has to drive on every day.

The citizens of Bluesky have a wonderful mail carrier named George. This is his encounter with Beth Anne.

Beth Anne pulled back the drapes in the front window and looked out at the porch. It was half past three o’clock and their mailman, George, would be there at any moment. Getting the mail was Beth Anne’s job and she loved it. George let her walk with him to the next few houses. Sometimes he had a funny story to tell her about things that happened on his mail route.

“Hey, there, young lady,” George called out as Beth Anne came through the front door. “Here’s your mail today.”

Beth Anne placed the mail on the table just inside the door and joined George as he pushed his cart down the driveway to the sidewalk. Beth Anne had to quicken her steps to keep pace with George. Every now and then, she would skip along to catch up. She chattered away happily as they walked. “When school starts I’m going to be in fifth grade. I’m going to be in reg’lar class, not in special class. Maybe I’ll be with some of my friends. I do good in school. I’ll be happy when school starts.”

“That’s great, honey,” George said as he walked up to the next house on his route. Beth Anne took the opportunity to rest and catch her breath.

“What’s that?” she asked as George returned to his cart. Beth Anne was pointing at a cardboard heart with an arrow and scribbly writing on it.

“That’s a card Joey gave me to deliver to Melissa,” George said with a grin. “He told me she’s his girlfriend.”

“I know,” Beth Anne giggled. “Melissa is on our Special Olympics swim team. Joey tries to whistle at her, but he can’t really do it right. It sounds like this.” Beth Anne put her lips together and blew air through them, making a loud farting sound.

“We used to call that a Bronx cheer,” George laughed. “I bet it didn’t get the results Joey hoped for.”

“Melissa didn’t say anything. She didn’t want to hurt Joey’s feelings.”

From: The Handy Helpers, Not a Happy Camper.

AMBUSHED

This past week was definitely the most difficult since the loss of my husband last December. When I tried to figure out what happened, I identified several possible triggers that just seemed to pile up on me. At the end of the week, I sought help from the chaplain who had been on Craig’s hospice team. Fortunately, he was able to spend some time talking with me and introduced me to someone who is a year ahead of me in the grieving process.

My new friend told me that what I experienced is called an ambush, and she assured me there will be more of them to come. While it was a painful week, it is comforting to know that it is a natural part of the grieving process.

I decided to do a little research to see what else I don’t know about what I am going through. An article I found on the AARP website, written by Ruth Davis Konigsberg debunked the idea that there are stages of grief. According to her research, those who are grieving experience more of a fluctuation. A day of sadness or anxiety can be followed by a day of joy and lightheartedness. This fits more with what I have experienced. Fortunately, there have been far more happy days than sad ones. And I can expect the sad ones to come less frequently as time passes.

Another encouraging finding in her study was that grief doesn’t last forever. The loss will always be there and so will the memories, but the acute grief will eventually disappear. She also found that humor has a healing affect on those who grieve. Being able to recall happy times and to smile when describing the one we’ve lost are healthy ways to deal with our grief.

Reading this article did help me uncover ways to redirect my thinking and focus on my emotions as I navigate this new journey I am on. I am sharing it with the hope that it will be helpful to others traveling this same path.

Book Five–Finished at last!

ID 72032850 © Nelosa | Dreamstime.com

It has taken longer than I expected, but this week I will be sending The Handy Helpers, No Burping! No Slurping! to my publisher.

In Book Five, Laura is challenged by her teacher to “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” (Ghandi) With the help of Beth Anne, she attempts to make friends with the new cafeteria worker who seems to be stressed and on edge in her new job. While the girls are successful in getting Mrs. Meniere to lighten up, the results of their efforts go far beyond what they ever expected.

Here are a few of the other things that happen in Book Five:

  • The Handy Helpers start fifth grade. Unfortunately, they are slit up, but they manage.
  • Rachel goes to an actual school for the first time. Of course Trisha is there to help her figure it out.
  • Daniel struggles with Tourette’s as he begins fourth grade. But this becomes easier when he makes new friends.
  • Jeremiah continues his relationship with Melody now that they are both seniors in high school.
  • Laura experiences frustration over being a middle child who is taken for granted. Amber is there to help her through it.
  • Laura’s little sisters, Molly and Taylor, have an adventure involving stolen kittens.
  • Spike reluctantly makes a new friend when Wylie Tanner moves to Bluesky.
  • The Handy Helpers become official.
  • Beth Anne finds out reg’lar class can be a challenge–that is until she meeting Eldon.
  • The book ends with a big event you won’t want to miss.

My readers who are fans of the Cole children will be very happy as their relationship with Gus continues to grow.  As you can see, a lot happens in Book Five.  I’ll let you know as soon as it is available.